Items to be featured of the movie that I will never get around to writing, producing, directing, or starring in

1. Rich People




2. Sigur Ros




3. Arcane literary references




4. iPhones




5. Multiple endings depending on what theater you are in and how I've profiled its demographic. Lookout if you're watching the one in which Ice-Cube figures.




6. Cinque-Terre




7. Langoustines




8. Moping




9. Jokes about Matthew McConnaughy's ubiqitous pectorals




10. A Whit Stilman cameo appearance




11. Product placement on a scale as yet unseen.




12. An awkward briss




13. A woman mispronouncing "Hypocrite" as "Hippopotamus"




14. A room with a poster of Alex Kovalev




15. A direct-to-camera soliliquy on the unsung value of the side-part by the lead who, incidentally, has a side-part.




16. Chattering. Lots and lots of chatter.